Oh, great. Here comes my nephew, Mikie. He is playing at the other end of the school gym. [The kid’s always surrounded by an entourage. Totally popular. Clearly, we are not related.] “Is she your grandmother?” Nosey Kid asks Mikie as he skips in my direction. So, let’s be clear: “She” is “me.” ME?! [Really? […]
Tag Archives: health
“Wow. You have the cleanest ceiling ever,” I said, as a my large breast was smashed like a pancake in the booby machine. The nurse was taken aback. [I am making polite conversation, lady. Hello? Work with me, okay?] “Um… yes, I guess we have cleaners,” she said laughing. “And they clean the ceiling?! That’s […]
“When was your last sexual encounter?” she asked directly. [Wow. That’s so forward….Take me to dinner first, at least.] Question: Remember the good old days when you talked about your vagina after some pie and coffee? “Over a year ago,” I said jokingly. “I am working on regaining my virginity.” I have no issues with […]
The Jiggly Bits 